today pete unrau told the story of the old man who, when asked if he liked the music played in his church on Sunday morning said

"well, no. its too loud. there is too much drums and they dont sing anything out of the hymn book. no, i don't love the music, but i love the people who do!"

over the past few months i've watched people i love leave our church for other churches because of the college and career. i've struggled so much with why this hole in the 19-23 year-old singles is widening.
should we be staying?
should we be going?
what can we actually do about it?
is it just a phase that the summer will fix?
all these things i've wrestled with over the summer when last week i went for coffee with a very wise girl... she told me that she was learning to hold the things she loved with an open palm. in typical youth leader fashion i said "oh, that's great madz." and thought about her life and how that would help her. it wasn't until i got home that i realized God was trying to teach me the lesson...
im learning that part of growing up is relationships changing and that i need to stop gripping so tightly to what i once held dear because it sure hurts alot more when God has to pry my knuckles open, as pete said this morning.
im also learning that i not only need to hold my friends with an open palm but also my church. regardless of my warring instincts to run with those who have left while also to stay and burrow into a hole and promise never to leave the family i know, regardless of these two emotions i need to keep my palms open so that God can mold and shape the things i love without having to pull them out of my grasp first.
so right now i dont really love the community feel for young adults my age at our church, i also dont really love that people i've grown up with are leaving but i love the people at my church and i also love the people who have left so i will try to do this all with more open hands....